You Are Not at Fault

I will say that I am pretty open about everything that happen to me but there are some things that I cannot be vocal about.

The reasoning behind that is because some people around me share most of my values and beliefs but every now and again there will something that is said that will surprise me. For example, I have spoken with individuals that have gone through sexual violence. I have seen paths they have taken after they go through their horrific experience, some paths good and others not so good. If I can offer guidance from my own healing, I do. But one story specifically comes to mind that I happened to be discussing with a relative. I was reaching out to the relative for advice on how to possibly help this person. When I explained the path they were going down (without revealing any personal info about the individual to keep their identity confidential), my relative said to me, "what is wrong with them?" I was very taken back by this statement. Nothing is wrong with them. They are reacting to trauma. Instead of saying what is wrong with them, we should be saying/asking "what happened to them?" I know that I am a little more attuned to this type of topic and many of my relatives have not experienced the trauma that I have gone through, nor do they understand trauma-informed care. But it is frustrating that they don't understand this. I am a firm believer that one should cut toxic people out of their life but in this example, this is just an instance that happened once. This relative believes me and my story and has been huge in my healing. I just hope that I might be able to help my family and friends understand trauma and give them a better approach on how to respond/react.