I don’t remember how old I was—eight or nine maybe.

I met a girl when I was on vacation with my family in the mountains. She was a year or two younger than me, but we clicked immediately. We spent the entire trip together. The best part was I found out she lived in the same town as me. After returning home I got an invitation to her birthday party. It was at a hotel an hour away from home and I couldn’t have been more excited. I showed up to the party and I didn’t know anyone but the girl who I had met in the mountains; let’s call her Kailey. We swam in the pool and watched movies and did everything that girls our age would have done. Kailey’s parents were in the room connected to ours. Toward the end of the night, I started to get tired and I warned everyone that I was probably going to fall asleep. The next thing I can remember is the horrible part.I woke up, laying on the ground, with all four girls giggling around me. All my clothes were off and I woke up to them poking a plastic straw up my butt. I felt ashamed and embarrassed. I yelled and cried and I sat on a chair away from everyone else. I didn’t sleep. One of the girls got up to tell Kailey’s parents and in the morning they brought me home. They told my mom that something had happened but it never felt like anyone understood what actually happened. I didn’t realize that what happened to me was wrong for a long time. I knew I was embarrassed, but I didn’t know that is was a big deal or why. By the time I was about 12 I realized that it was not okay what those girls did to me. I always brushed it off though saying that they were young and didn’t understand. But it doesn’t matter. That night still haunts me, especially because one of the girls who was there, goes to school with me. I see her on a daily basis. I still never fall asleep first at sleepovers. I am always cautious about anything that could be a dangerous situation or a situation that could lead to assault. My friends think I’m too cautious but they don’t know what it’s like. I will never completely heal from this, but I’m hoping sharing my story will help me accept what happened to me.