Shh... This Will Be Our Little Secret

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It was an August night

Barely 18 you in your mid to late 30s

Sitting by a bonfire having drinks n telling

Stories with your friends.

Laughing n enjoying the night not knowing

What evil was lurking my way.

In the garage looking through CDs trying

To find my song.

Evil is starting to make his move

I'm pushed up against the van with your lips

Against mine, your hands moving faster than I can keep up with, n your body pressing against mine. Telling me you've waited a long time for this.

I finally speak "No," I say "you’re my sister’s husband, we can't. this is wrong" you tell me "it'll be our little secret" I'm still uneasy. You make me promise not to tell. I shake my head yes, as I already knew evil had clinched me in.

Under a tree you pick, laying down a blue blanket

You lay me down n again I say I'm not sure about this.

You take off my bottoms n push up my shirt

You start performing oral my mind is not into it

My legs start shaking my naive mind just assumed I was cold not realizing till much later

My body was in fact betraying me. I try n pull myself away but your grip is too strong.

You’re on top of me I don't want this, you push yourself inside me

I ask you to please stop you’re hurting me

I can still hear the exact words in the exact tone "oh I'm hurting you" almost like you were pleased with yourself.  Eventually you finished n tossed me my clothes n reminded me this was our little secret...

It didn't stay that way for long I told n reported n you made me out to be a liar convinced the cops n my parents n my sister that I was asking for it. That I was flirting with you... I was told because I didn't act like someone who had been raped then I must not of been.. unbeknownst to everyone I curled up in bed alone that night n didn't sleep at all...

I told "our secret" but in the end

Who really won? I was made out to be a liar and you the known woman beater got off scot-free.